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Post by Cryogenic on Aug 20, 2020 19:05:39 GMT
As far as Lucas's intentions go, Palpatine wasn't coming back, as he was able to confirm to McDiarmid when the sequel trilogy was announced. And we do know Lucas' sentiment on some EU ideas that don't gel with his: "[Vader] doesn't come back to life, the Emperor doesn't get cloned and Luke doesn't get married."Well, two out of three ain't bad! |
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Post by ArchdukeOfNaboo on Sept 2, 2020 16:38:45 GMT
Production designer of TFA speaks about TLJ
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Post by jppiper on Nov 3, 2020 8:58:52 GMT
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M-I-D-1E
Representative
I am...
Posts: 12 
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Post by M-I-D-1E on Nov 6, 2020 7:50:28 GMT
People need to stop kissing China's a**
Well, when China demands we behave like racists in order to perpetuate their own entrenched racism, we can at least politely decline. I really don't think that is too much to ask for.
It hurts seeing Disney deploying John Boyega for their recent social media antics. Leaves a very sour taste.
What was it GL described them in the Charlie Rose interview, again?
China can’t be a problem if the enablers are receptive to their business deals;) |
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Post by thephantomcalamari on Dec 22, 2020 19:39:12 GMT
So, having only seen most of the first season of The Mandalorian as of yet, I can't comment on anything more recent. But isn't this show very visually unimaginative when it comes to environments? Take the desert planet we visit in the second episode:  Apparently, this is not Tatooine. How is something like this not a massive Star Wars sin? I genuinely don't understand how a show spearheaded by people who respect George Lucas's creative ethos would let something like this happen. This is one of the main kinds of thing he was a huge stickler for. |
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Post by Alexrd on Dec 22, 2020 20:47:52 GMT
So, having only seen most of the first season of The Mandalorian as of yet, I can't comment on anything more recent. But isn't this show very visually unimaginative when it comes to environments? Take the desert planet we visit in the second episode: Apparently, this is not Tatooine. How is something like this not a massive Star Wars sin? I genuinely don't understand how a show spearheaded by people who respect George Lucas's creative ethos would let something like this happen. This is the one of the main kinds of thing he was a huge stickler for. Indeed. I said the exact same thing at the time (technically, I've been saying the same thing since The Farce Awakens). Honestly, I almost couldn't tell apart any of the first season forgettable planets since they looked so similiar. And the worse thing is these are all virtual sets. They could do literally anything. George, with the same technology, wasn't afraid to go right into a complex environment like Coruscant. Here, with all the money and freedom in the world, they chose to go for the most barren, forgettable environments ever. |
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Post by thephantomcalamari on Dec 23, 2020 17:40:28 GMT
Also, in terms of what the show is about, I'm not sure why they had to introduce the EU-inspired concept of Mandalorian Foundlings. From what I can tell, the show is about a rigid fundamentalist from a warrior culture learning to care for an adopted child. But wouldn't that story have been stronger if they had simply stuck to Lucas's conception of the Mandalorians, who were essentially a violent xenophobic cult? If the adoption of children from other races was already part of the fundamentalist Mandalorian ethos, doesn't that make what happens in the show less surprising? As far as I can tell, the only reason to introduce all this stuff is to make the Mandalorians "cool" again. And you see this happening. Once again, everyone thinks Mandalorian warrior culture is something with an underlying nobility that's worthy of being admired (despite some rough edges). It's a reaction to what Lucas did with them, which was to establish the ancient Mandalorians as basically being Spartans--but the real Spartans, not the 300 Spartans. You know, in modern terms, they're basically Nazis. The Mandalorian superfans obviously really didn't like that, and what The Mandalorian is doing is trying to appease those fans, because Mandalorians are super marketable and so they need to be rehabilitated. And this is the real reason it's important that Jango and Boba not be Mandalorians. It's not arbitrary, and it's not just about blindly adhering to everything Lucas says as canon. It's about making it very clear who the Mandalorians are and what they're all about. It's about maintaining their symbolic power. The Mandalorians are a regimented race of supercommandos, a bunch of ideologically-motivated, social Darwinist thugs. Jango and Boba are not that, they're just bounty hunters. And the very fact that they don't look like Nordic Übermenschen sets them very clearly apart. And so the only way to fit them into the Mandalorian mold Lucas established is to say that Jango was adopted into it--to say that the Mandalorians are not in fact xenophobic Spartans, but nice fluffy Spartans who adopt children from other races and cultures and only care about adherence to their noble creed, not racial purity. This makes a complete hash of the symbolic relationships established by Lucas. George wanted Mandalorians to be scary as hell.  Yes, their armor is cool, but they represent something very ugly and terrible. They represent the domination of the weak by the strong, the fetishization of technology and weaponry, and a lust for violence. The idea that there's anything noble about them is anathema to everything Lucas set out to communicate. The idea that Mandalorian armor--a symbol of technological weaponry in direct opposition to the primitive simplicity of the lightsaber--can in fact be presented as an object of veneration equivalent to the way the Jedi view their lightsabers, is nothing short of a perversion. It's just totally dispiriting to me how this distorted interpretation of the Mandalorians has not only been re-introduced into Star Wars canon, but has in fact become the new face and driving force of the Star Wars franchise. Now practically everything in Star Wars can be traced back to the Mandalorians and their noble ways. The Bad Batch? It's a show about the clones created by Jango for the purpose of perpetuating the noble Mandalorian race of warriors. The Book of Boba? It's a show about Jango's Mandalorian heir, created in order to carry on the legacy of his own Mandalorian clan. At the very least, whether intended or not, this is how I now see many fans interpreting things. The Mandalorians have practically usurped the Jedi's role the franchise, and it's not surprising, because The Mandalorian has practically turned them into Jedi. |
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Post by Alexrd on Dec 23, 2020 18:53:49 GMT
Also, in terms of what the show is about, I'm not sure why they had to introduce the EU-inspired concept of Mandalorian Foundlings. From what I can tell, the show is about a rigid fundamentalist from a warrior culture learning to care for an adopted child. But wouldn't that story have been stronger if they had simply stuck to Lucas's conception of the Mandalorians, who were essentially a violent xenophobic cult? If the adoption of children from other races was already part of the fundamentalist Mandalorian ethos, doesn't that make what happens in the show less surprising? As far as I can tell, the only reason to introduce all this stuff is to make the Mandalorians "cool" again. And you see this happening. Once again, everyone thinks Mandalorian warrior culture is something with an underlying nobility that's worthy of being admired (despite some rough edges). It's a reaction to what Lucas did with them, which was to establish the ancient Mandalorians as basically being Spartans--but the real Spartans, not the 300 Spartans. You know, in modern terms, they're basically Nazis. The Mandalorian superfans obviously really didn't like that, and what The Mandalorian is doing is trying to appease those fans, because Mandalorians are super marketable and so they need to be rehabilitated. And this is the real reason it's important that Jango and Boba not be Mandalorians. It's not arbitrary, and it's not just about blindly adhering to everything Lucas says as canon. It's about making it very clear who the Mandalorians are and what they're all about. It's about maintaining their symbolic power. The Mandalorians are a regimented race of supercommandos, a bunch of ideologically-motivated, social Darwinist thugs. Jango and Boba are not that, they're just bounty hunters. And the very fact that they don't look like Nordic Übermenschen sets them very clearly apart. And so the only way to fit them into the Mandalorian mold Lucas established is to say that Jango was adopted into it--to say that the Mandalorians are not in fact xenophobic Spartans, but nice fluffy Spartans who adopt children from other races and cultures and only care about adherence to their noble creed, not racial purity. This makes a complete hash of the symbolic relationships established by Lucas. George wanted Mandalorians to be scary as hell. Yes, their armor is cool, but they represent something very ugly and terrible. They represent the domination of the weak by the strong, the fetishization of technology and weaponry, and a lust for violence. The idea that there's anything noble about them is anathema to everything Lucas set out to communicate. The idea that Mandalorian armor--a symbol of technological weaponry in direct opposition to the primitive simplicity of the lightsaber--can in fact be presented as an object of veneration equivalent to the way the Jedi view their lightsabers, is nothing short of a perversion. It's just totally dispiriting to me how this distorted interpretation of the Mandalorians has not only been re-introduced into Star Wars canon, but has in fact become the new face and driving force of the Star Wars franchise. Now practically everything in Star Wars can be traced back to the Mandalorians and their noble ways. The Bad Batch? It's a show about the clones created by Jango for the purpose of perpetuating the noble Mandalorian race of warriors. The Book of Boba? It's a show about Jango's Mandalorian heir, created in order to carry on the legacy of his own Mandalorian clan. At the very least, whether intended or not, this is how I now see many fans interpreting things. The Mandalorians have practically usurped the Jedi's role the franchise, and it's not surprising, because The Mandalorian has practically turned them into Jedi. I wouldn't exactly call them nazis, even if they have some aspects in common. But spartans, totally. Nordic, ethnocentric, hi-tech spartans. The guy in charge of the Mandalorian, Dave Filoni, is the same guy who, when he had George Lucas over his shoulder dictating how things are (and aren't), said this back in 2009: "To George, the Mandalorians above all — dating back to The Empire Strikes Back — are supercommandos. They’re a race of people that were a military. They can’t be so vagabond as they’ve appeared in the EU. They can’t be this group of people that are vastly different in paint job and paint scheme. Because if you do that, they look too much immediately like a bunch of Boba Fetts. It robbed Boba Fett of his uniqueness.
We needed a military. We needed an army. They have a very uniform look. They are trying to bring back the ancient Mandalorian ways of being the supercommando and regain dominion for their mythology." Now he's doing the complete opposite.
This general creative regression from what George Lucas established back to the EU misconceptions and approaches to Star Wars is probably the most disappointing thing about these new Disney productions. And why? For mindless pandering.
Another thing that I've pointed out regarding the completely backwards logic in The Mandalorian is that, in the series, the Jedi are considered a race of sorcerers and Mandalorians are considered a creed.
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Post by jppiper on Dec 24, 2020 0:26:19 GMT
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Post by Cryogenic on Dec 24, 2020 1:40:30 GMT
Just reading those comments (that have just been made): Alexrd , my dear, you're still famous... Gotta hand it to Alessio. That guy never stops! As for Dave Filoni not doing anything "divisive". Yeah... He's being utterly boring. Give me the trippy sci-fi horror of a resurrected Palpatine on lightning-bolt-lashed Exegol over crowd-pleasing TV spinoff nonsense, any day. And to say that the Sequel Trilogy undoes the Original Trilogy is a bald statement. |
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Post by Ingram on Dec 24, 2020 6:14:40 GMT
I guess I just find it kinda disappointing that Boba Fett is now less a straight villain than he is (a somewhat ennobled) antihero, as steered by Season 2 of The Mandalorian. Wasn't that kinda the point of the new Mando character himself, to explore a version of this race/creed/what-have-you who has been taxed with a degree of virtue? Ya know, sometimes it's okay for bad guys to be left to their own council, so to speak. I never thought Jango and Boba Fett were evil incarnate; where even Jango himself coins his motivation as a simple man making his way through the cosmos. Yet in those Saga films they're both solid thugs. Good ol' fashioned bastards. Unscrupulous to the core. Jabba, Jango, Grievous... in Star Wars you need heroes and tragic heroes and scoundrels with hearts of gold and chaotic neutrals and the Devil, but you also need some straight up nefarious sons-a-bitches. I always liked Jango and Boba precisely because they were so elementally self-preserving criminals.
I'm not really all that interested in sympathizing with Boba just because it can be written that way. But it would seem the character's legacy "cool factor" has reached a tipping point where he must be further justified. Even where Lucas may or may not have revised otherwise (I suspect out of caprice more than anything else), as far as I'm concerned the fiend that was Boba Fett is rotting away in the belly of a sarlacc—end of story. Everything else is just else.
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Post by thephantomcalamari on Dec 24, 2020 17:15:44 GMT
I guess I just find it kinda disappointing that Boba Fett is now less a straight villain than he is (a somewhat ennobled) antihero, as steered by Season 2 of The Mandalorian. Wasn't that kinda the point of the new Mando character himself, to explore a version of this race/creed/what-have-you who has been taxed with a degree of virtue? Ya know, sometimes it's okay for bad guys to be left to their own council, so to speak. I never thought Jango and Boba Fett were evil incarnate; where even Jango himself coins his motivation as a simple man making his way through the cosmos. Yet in those Saga films they're both solid thugs. Good ol' fashioned bastards. Unscrupulous to the core. Jabba, Jango, Grievous... in Star Wars you need heroes and tragic heroes and scoundrels with hearts of gold and chaotic neutrals and the Devil, but you also need some straight up nefarious sons-a-bitches. I always liked Jango and Boba precisely because there were so elementally self-preserving criminals.
I'm not really all that interested in sympathizing with Boba just because it can be written that way. But it would seem the character's legacy "cool factor" has reached a tipping point where he must be further justified. Even where Lucas may or may not have revised otherwise (I suspect out of caprice more than anything else), as far as I'm concerned the fiend that was Boba Fett is rotting away in the belly of a sarlacc—end of story. Everything else is just else.
That's the thing about Jango. From his perspective, he really is just a simple man trying to make his way in the universe. He's just doing a job he's good at and making money to raise his son. Of course, the job he's good at happens to involve hunting, imprisoning, and assassinating people without any moral consideration whatsoever. But other than that, he's just your average workaday family man. But the added detail of Jango being a dad is only interesting if he's totally self-interested in every other respect--and even then, the peculiar thing about his version of fatherhood is that he's essentially just reproducing himself. Whereas Obi-Wan struggles with the emotional distance between himself and a "son" who is so very different from him, Jango might as well be reproducing by budding. Jango makes for a strange contrast with Obi-Wan. It's really a battle between two single fathers with a very different approach to life. The high-tech mercenary vs. the primitive warrior-monk. A man loyal to the highest bidder vs. a man loyal to a principle. That's the role Jango occupies in the movie. I don't see how being a member of an ancient, creed-based warrior culture really fits into that. It plays into the fantasies of a certain part of the fanbase, but other than that, it's just a big ol' non-sequitur. It might have made enough sense when "Mandalorian" was such a vague concept and we all just assumed that's what the Fetts were, but given what the Mandalorians were eventually established to be in The Clone Wars. there's no longer any place for the Fetts without a lot of narrative special pleading. The only thing the Fetts have in common with the Mandalorians is the centrality of violence to their lives--that's why they share the symbol of the Mandalorian armor between them--but the way they employ violence is very different. The Fetts employ violence for capitalist reasons, to get ahead in the modern game of life. The Mandalorians employ violence for cultural reasons, to uphold their ancient mythology and traditions and bring inherent meaning to their lives. That's why true Mandalorians like Almec have such contempt for a bounty hunter like Jango appropriating the symbol of their culture for such a materialistic end. To them, it's a desecration. And I imagine this is why Lucas saw the Fetts and the Mandalorians as being distinctly separate. They represent different things. Of course The Mandalorian, with its rampant conflation of Mandalorianism with bounty hunting and the mercenary lifestyle, just goes and scribbles "BOBA FETT BOBA FETT BOBA FETT" over the whole thing, and in so doing carelessly obscures these meaningful philosophical differences. |
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Post by Cryogenic on Dec 24, 2020 21:22:07 GMT
See...
Disney are all about the low-hanging fruit. Don't do anything daring, eccentric, abstruse, challenging, or outrageous. Just keep aiming low and pumping out more of the same derivative, tweaked, fan-pandering shit. The strategy has worked quite well so far. Bumps in the road, sure. But lucre has been made. Twenty years of people calling the prequels terrible and Jar Jar a "racist caricature", and you end up with a dozen new desert planets and some character with a bucket on his head, and this annoying little sock wind-up cauliflower teddy everyone instantly agreed was fit to be called "Baby Yoda". It's the "make Gollum with big eyes" anime approach again. Works like a charm. Simplify, cuteify, and nostalgiafy the crap out of everything. Approval guaranteed. Boba Fett Awakens. The Last Boba. Rise Of The Mandalorian. Sorry. Those movies I'm punning are actually interesting. Sorta. But it's all the same template. Legoland Star Wars. A fascist logo works well in the era of fascist-capitalism -- who knew? Daddy Iger has his millions. No, his billions. So does Papa Lucas. Darth Vader killing rebels in a corridor in an ultra-violent "give 'em what they want and make 'em think they've seen something memorable" climax. If Rogue One had it, then The Mandalorian has to have it, too. How childish. Like father, like son. Rhyming! TV mini-series emulating movie that looks like a TV mini-series. Fake Skywalker twins to the rescue. What is it they've sent us? Hope. Fuck. I was even born in Good Hope Hospital. Was I always destined to be a Star Wars fan? Hmm. Bottled hope, liberated despair. Same old, same old. You can't teach an old Wookiee new tricks. You can gave him an old medal, though. Chewie, we're home. The prequels have been quarantined. They gots the coronavirus. Chinese flu destroyed the takings of the sequels. The great firewall of China. LOL. Where's its fatal weakness? Almost wrote "wokeness". Disney's own Great Leap Forward hasn't been so great. I felt a great disturbance in the Force as if millions of midi-chlorians suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced. Your father's lightsaber. Freudian, dirty, crude. Not elegant. But that's okay. Now it's known as Rey's saber. A reysaber. Hey, that's pretty good. Looks pretty bad. It has been remade! Wrong trilogy. They took a lot of ideas from that one, though. Cradle of filth. Dirty whoring. The First Order will not rest until Skywalker, the last Jedi, has been destroyed. That's actually a pretty cool sentence. They all are. Luke Skywalker has vanished. Luke on Crait. Premonitions. Careful you must be when sensing the future, Anakin. Where's this paragraph going? I don't know. A mysterious broadcast. Snoke as a Forcecast. Palpatine made Snoke. Good ideas, weird left-turns. Star Wars refuses to absolutely suck. But it often blows. Glass-blowing. These are some fine ornaments. Don't break them. Those urns in Revenge Of The Sith flanking Anakin. Kylo breaking his helmet and the Darth Vader plinth with Rey's help. Mask falls awkwardly to the ground. So that's where you are. Rey in the 2001 hotel, Kylo on Blade Runner planet. Kylo inside a snowglobe. I'll come tell you. Wayfinders. She's going to Exegol. She can't do that! Well, there's some pieces in there. Print that one. Anakin is a little boy who lives with his mother. These things, yeah, Jedis cut 'em down like they're butter, and they really are pretty useless. Yeah, pretty useless. Look at this ol' dangleweed here. Knights of Ren. Ghouls. Do you know why The Mandalorian sucks harder than the Sequel Trilogy? Because it's not the Sequel Trilogy. Only a Sith deals in absolutes. Thank goodness Darth Vader killed Obi-Wan before he lived to see the Sequel Trilogy. He got trapped in a box. Don't be af-rey-ed. R2-D2! It is you, it is you! George Lucas's Golden Rule of life: don't burn down the coffee shop. Steal all their beans instead? Cool beans. The villainous plot of Superman III. Rian Johnson mentioning the supercomputer from Superman III on Twitter and conflating himself with it. Rian Johnson: the ultimate trickster? Rey rising in the light. Rey's bagel rising. The Rise Of Dough-Eater. I need a weapon! You have one. Your weapons. You will not need them. I feel cold. Kylo touching the refrigerated Vader helmet. The ice theme of The Rise Of Skywalker. The Phantom Emperor. The Phantom Menace. Pulling the strings. Always, in the shadows, from the very beginning. Poe hates to be the bearer of bad news. The Force creates Anakin Skywalker to combat the sexiness of Oscar Isaac. Billy Dee Williams outcharms everyone. Yellow is the most underrated colour. Boba is the most overrated character. The Jawas have been ruined now. Stop humanising all the characters. I want to crush these idiots under JJ's mystery box. The normalisation of Star Wars is dangerous and disturbing. Entertainment losing all its leading lights. The fading grandeur of the Old Republic. There'll never be anything as beautiful as Padme's spaceships, or Padme's dresses, or Padme's handmaidens, or Padme's Padmeness ever again. This sucks. Meditation scene in Attack Of The Clones. That definitely doesn't suck. Serene beauty that you can't put your finger on is something Star Wars needs more of. Rebels vs. Empire should die. Star Wars has faulty DNA. Time for a reboot? Oh, wait. JJ already did that. Alternate timeline. Beyond the infinite. To infinity and beyond. Disney are such rip-off merchants. Disney+ sounds like a heartburn medication. Everyone is entrenching themselves into consumerist ways. Epic retreat from reality. The droid army is in full retreat. Well, if droids could think... Well, if it works... Big greasy spoon diner owner whom Obi-Wan hugs like a cephalopod. Best part of the PT? Only if all the other parts weren't best. Ahmed Best. Jar Jar should have been talking to Rey when she is about to take down the Emperor. Missed opportunities. Star Wars reached peak goodness with the prequels. Other parts are paradoxically better, but not sustained. Total vision. That's the way of King George. Everything else is kinda optional? So pick the parts you like. I like the cafeteria buffet of the ST. Especially the last film. Can't you tell? Lightspeed skipping. I'll never tire of that opening. Star Wars is like the most desirable chick you'll ever meet: sexy and annoying. It's all a machine, partner. Sex dolls are the wave of the future, but sex will be banned. D'oh! Have fun with Star Wars as an imperfect replacement for a functioning sex life. Learn to use the Force and maybe your situation will improve.
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Post by Ingram on Dec 25, 2020 1:22:48 GMT
See... Disney are all about the low-hanging fruit. Don't do anything daring, eccentric, abstruse, challenging, or outrageous. Just keep aiming low and pumping out more of the same derivative, tweaked, fan-pandering shit. The strategy has worked quite well so far. Bumps in the road, sure. But lucre has been made. Twenty years of people calling the prequels terrible and Jar Jar a "racist caricature", and you end up with a dozen new desert planets and some character with a bucket on his head, and this annoying little sock wind-up cauliflower teddy everyone instantly agreed was fit to be called "Baby Yoda". It's the "make Gollum with big eyes" anime approach again. Works like a charm. Simplify, cuteify, and nostalgiafy the crap out of everything. Approval guaranteed. Boba Fett Awakens. The Last Boba. Rise Of The Mandalorian. Sorry. Those movies I'm punning are actually interesting. Sorta. But it's all the same template. Legoland Star Wars. A fascist logo works well in the era of fascist-capitalism -- who knew? Daddy Iger has his millions. No, his billions. So does Papa Lucas. Darth Vader killing rebels in a corridor in an ultra-violent "give 'em what they want and make 'em think they've seen something memorable" climax. If Rogue One had it, then The Mandalorian has to have it, too. How childish. Like father, like son. Rhyming! TV mini-series emulating movie that looks like a TV mini-series. Fake Skywalker twins to the rescue. What is it they've sent us? Hope. Fuck. I was even born in Good Hope Hospital. Was I always destined to be a Star Wars fan? Hmm. Bottled hope, liberated despair. Same old, same old. You can't teach an old Wookiee new tricks. You can gave him an old medal, though. Chewie, we're home. The prequels have been quarantined. They gots the coronavirus. Chinese flu destroyed the takings of the sequels. The great firewall of China. LOL. Where's its fatal weakness? Almost wrote "wokeness". Disney's own Great Leap Forward hasn't been so great. I felt a great disturbance in the Force as if millions of midi-chlorians suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced. Your father's lightsaber. Freudian, dirty, crude. Not elegant. But that's okay. Now it's known as Rey's saber. A reysaber. Hey, that's pretty good. Looks pretty bad. It has been remade! Wrong trilogy. They took a lot of ideas from that one, though. Cradle of filth. Dirty whoring. The First Order will not rest until Skywalker, the last Jedi, has been destroyed. That's actually a pretty cool sentence. They all are. Luke Skywalker has vanished. Luke on Crait. Premonitions. Careful you must be when sensing the future, Anakin. Where's this paragraph going? I don't know. A mysterious broadcast. Snoke as a Forcecast. Palpatine made Snoke. Good ideas, weird left-turns. Star Wars refuses to absolutely suck. But it often blows. Glass-blowing. These are some fine ornaments. Don't break them. Those urns in Revenge Of The Sith flanking Anakin. Kylo breaking his helmet and the Darth Vader plinth with Rey's help. Mask falls awkwardly to the ground. So that's where you are. Rey in the 2001 hotel, Kylo on Blade Runner planet. Kylo inside a snowglobe. I'll come tell you. Wayfinders. She's going to Exegol. She can't do that! Well, there's some pieces in there. Print that one. Anakin is a little boy who lives with his mother. These things, yeah, Jedis cut 'em down like they're butter, and they really are pretty useless. Yeah, pretty useless. Look at this ol' dangleweed here. Knights of Ren. Ghouls. Do you know why The Mandalorian sucks harder than the Sequel Trilogy? Because it's not the Sequel Trilogy. Only a Sith deals in absolutes. Thank goodness Darth Vader killed Obi-Wan before he lived to see the Sequel Trilogy. He got trapped in a box. Don't be af-rey-ed. R2-D2! It is you, it is you! George Lucas's Golden Rule of life: don't burn down the coffee shop. Steal all their beans instead? Cool beans. The villainous plot of Superman III. Rian Johnson mentioning the supercomputer from Superman III on Twitter and conflating himself with it. Rian Johnson: the ultimate trickster? Rey rising in the light. Rey's bagel rising. The Rise Of Dough-Eater. I need a weapon! You have one. Your weapons. You will not need them. I feel cold. Kylo touching the refrigerated Vader helmet. The ice theme of The Rise Of Skywalker. The Phantom Emperor. The Phantom Menace. Pulling the strings. Always, in the shadows, from the very beginning. Poe hates to be the bearer of bad news. The Force creates Anakin Skywalker to combat the sexiness of Oscar Isaac. Billy Dee Williams outcharms everyone. Yellow is the most underrated colour. Boba is the most overrated character. The Jawas have been ruined now. Stop humanising all the characters. I want to crush these idiots under JJ's mystery box. The normalisation of Star Wars is dangerous and disturbing. Entertainment losing all its leading lights. The fading grandeur of the Old Republic. There'll never be anything as beautiful as Padme's spaceships, or Padme's dresses, or Padme's handmaidens, or Padme's Padmeness ever again. This sucks. Meditation scene in Attack Of The Clones. That definitely doesn't suck. Serene beauty that you can't put your finger on is something Star Wars needs more of. Rebels vs. Empire should die. Star Wars has faulty DNA. Time for a reboot? Oh, wait. JJ already did that. Alternate timeline. Beyond the infinite. To infinity and beyond. Disney are such rip-off merchants. Disney+ sounds like a heartburn medication. Everyone is entrenching themselves into consumerist ways. Epic retreat from reality. The droid army is in full retreat. Well, if droids could think... Well, if it works... Big greasy spoon diner owner whom Obi-Wan hugs like a cephalopod. Best part of the PT? Only if all the other parts weren't best. Ahmed Best. Jar Jar should have been talking to Rey when she is about to take down the Emperor. Missed opportunities. Star Wars reached peak goodness with the prequels. Other parts are paradoxically better, but not sustained. Total vision. That's the way of King George. Everything else is kinda optional? So pick the parts you like. I like the cafeteria buffet of the ST. Especially the last film. Can't you tell? Lightspeed skipping. I'll never tire of that opening. Star Wars is like the most desirable chick you'll ever meet: sexy and annoying. It's all a machine, partner. Sex dolls are the wave of the future, but sex will be banned. D'oh! Have fun with Star Wars as an imperfect replacement for a functioning sex life. Learn to use the Force and maybe your situation will improve. TLDR Kidding. |
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Post by thephantomcalamari on Dec 25, 2020 3:45:04 GMT
See... Disney are all about the low-hanging fruit. Don't do anything daring, eccentric, abstruse, challenging, or outrageous. Just keep aiming low and pumping out more of the same derivative, tweaked, fan-pandering shit. The strategy has worked quite well so far. Bumps in the road, sure. But lucre has been made. Twenty years of people calling the prequels terrible and Jar Jar a "racist caricature", and you end up with a dozen new desert planets and some character with a bucket on his head, and this annoying little sock wind-up cauliflower teddy everyone instantly agreed was fit to be called "Baby Yoda". It's the "make Gollum with big eyes" anime approach again. Works like a charm. Simplify, cuteify, and nostalgiafy the crap out of everything. Approval guaranteed. Boba Fett Awakens. The Last Boba. Rise Of The Mandalorian. Sorry. Those movies I'm punning are actually interesting. Sorta. But it's all the same template. Legoland Star Wars. A fascist logo works well in the era of fascist-capitalism -- who knew? Daddy Iger has his millions. No, his billions. So does Papa Lucas. Darth Vader killing rebels in a corridor in an ultra-violent "give 'em what they want and make 'em think they've seen something memorable" climax. If Rogue One had it, then The Mandalorian has to have it, too. How childish. Like father, like son. Rhyming! TV mini-series emulating movie that looks like a TV mini-series. Fake Skywalker twins to the rescue. What is it they've sent us? Hope. Fuck. I was even born in Good Hope Hospital. Was I always destined to be a Star Wars fan? Hmm. Bottled hope, liberated despair. Same old, same old. You can't teach an old Wookiee new tricks. You can gave him an old medal, though. Chewie, we're home. The prequels have been quarantined. They gots the coronavirus. Chinese flu destroyed the takings of the sequels. The great firewall of China. LOL. Where's its fatal weakness? Almost wrote "wokeness". Disney's own Great Leap Forward hasn't been so great. I felt a great disturbance in the Force as if millions of midi-chlorians suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced. Your father's lightsaber. Freudian, dirty, crude. Not elegant. But that's okay. Now it's known as Rey's saber. A reysaber. Hey, that's pretty good. Looks pretty bad. It has been remade! Wrong trilogy. They took a lot of ideas from that one, though. Cradle of filth. Dirty whoring. The First Order will not rest until Skywalker, the last Jedi, has been destroyed. That's actually a pretty cool sentence. They all are. Luke Skywalker has vanished. Luke on Crait. Premonitions. Careful you must be when sensing the future, Anakin. Where's this paragraph going? I don't know. A mysterious broadcast. Snoke as a Forcecast. Palpatine made Snoke. Good ideas, weird left-turns. Star Wars refuses to absolutely suck. But it often blows. Glass-blowing. These are some fine ornaments. Don't break them. Those urns in Revenge Of The Sith flanking Anakin. Kylo breaking his helmet and the Darth Vader plinth with Rey's help. Mask falls awkwardly to the ground. So that's where you are. Rey in the 2001 hotel, Kylo on Blade Runner planet. Kylo inside a snowglobe. I'll come tell you. Wayfinders. She's going to Exegol. She can't do that! Well, there's some pieces in there. Print that one. Anakin is a little boy who lives with his mother. These things, yeah, Jedis cut 'em down like they're butter, and they really are pretty useless. Yeah, pretty useless. Look at this ol' dangleweed here. Knights of Ren. Ghouls. Do you know why The Mandalorian sucks harder than the Sequel Trilogy? Because it's not the Sequel Trilogy. Only a Sith deals in absolutes. Thank goodness Darth Vader killed Obi-Wan before he lived to see the Sequel Trilogy. He got trapped in a box. Don't be af-rey-ed. R2-D2! It is you, it is you! George Lucas's Golden Rule of life: don't burn down the coffee shop. Steal all their beans instead? Cool beans. The villainous plot of Superman III. Rian Johnson mentioning the supercomputer from Superman III on Twitter and conflating himself with it. Rian Johnson: the ultimate trickster? Rey rising in the light. Rey's bagel rising. The Rise Of Dough-Eater. I need a weapon! You have one. Your weapons. You will not need them. I feel cold. Kylo touching the refrigerated Vader helmet. The ice theme of The Rise Of Skywalker. The Phantom Emperor. The Phantom Menace. Pulling the strings. Always, in the shadows, from the very beginning. Poe hates to be the bearer of bad news. The Force creates Anakin Skywalker to combat the sexiness of Oscar Isaac. Billy Dee Williams outcharms everyone. Yellow is the most underrated colour. Boba is the most overrated character. The Jawas have been ruined now. Stop humanising all the characters. I want to crush these idiots under JJ's mystery box. The normalisation of Star Wars is dangerous and disturbing. Entertainment losing all its leading lights. The fading grandeur of the Old Republic. There'll never be anything as beautiful as Padme's spaceships, or Padme's dresses, or Padme's handmaidens, or Padme's Padmeness ever again. This sucks. Meditation scene in Attack Of The Clones. That definitely doesn't suck. Serene beauty that you can't put your finger on is something Star Wars needs more of. Rebels vs. Empire should die. Star Wars has faulty DNA. Time for a reboot? Oh, wait. JJ already did that. Alternate timeline. Beyond the infinite. To infinity and beyond. Disney are such rip-off merchants. Disney+ sounds like a heartburn medication. Everyone is entrenching themselves into consumerist ways. Epic retreat from reality. The droid army is in full retreat. Well, if droids could think... Well, if it works... Big greasy spoon diner owner whom Obi-Wan hugs like a cephalopod. Best part of the PT? Only if all the other parts weren't best. Ahmed Best. Jar Jar should have been talking to Rey when she is about to take down the Emperor. Missed opportunities. Star Wars reached peak goodness with the prequels. Other parts are paradoxically better, but not sustained. Total vision. That's the way of King George. Everything else is kinda optional? So pick the parts you like. I like the cafeteria buffet of the ST. Especially the last film. Can't you tell? Lightspeed skipping. I'll never tire of that opening. Star Wars is like the most desirable chick you'll ever meet: sexy and annoying. It's all a machine, partner. Sex dolls are the wave of the future, but sex will be banned. D'oh! Have fun with Star Wars as an imperfect replacement for a functioning sex life. Learn to use the Force and maybe your situation will improve. Paragraph breaks, Cryo, paragraph breaks! This is why lightspeed skipping is so dangerous. |
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Post by Subtext Mining on Dec 25, 2020 10:12:40 GMT
It's an homage to Pyro. That's part of the context.
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Post by Somny on Dec 25, 2020 13:13:54 GMT
See... Disney are all about the low-hanging fruit. Don't do anything daring, eccentric, abstruse, challenging, or outrageous. Just keep aiming low and pumping out more of the same derivative, tweaked, fan-pandering shit. The strategy has worked quite well so far. Bumps in the road, sure. But lucre has been made. Twenty years of people calling the prequels terrible and Jar Jar a "racist caricature", and you end up with a dozen new desert planets and some character with a bucket on his head, and this annoying little sock wind-up cauliflower teddy everyone instantly agreed was fit to be called "Baby Yoda". It's the "make Gollum with big eyes" anime approach again. Works like a charm. Simplify, cuteify, and nostalgiafy the crap out of everything. Approval guaranteed. Boba Fett Awakens. The Last Boba. Rise Of The Mandalorian. Sorry. Those movies I'm punning are actually interesting. Sorta. But it's all the same template. Legoland Star Wars. A fascist logo works well in the era of fascist-capitalism -- who knew? Daddy Iger has his millions. No, his billions. So does Papa Lucas. Darth Vader killing rebels in a corridor in an ultra-violent "give 'em what they want and make 'em think they've seen something memorable" climax. If Rogue One had it, then The Mandalorian has to have it, too. How childish. Like father, like son. Rhyming! TV mini-series emulating movie that looks like a TV mini-series. Fake Skywalker twins to the rescue. What is it they've sent us? Hope. Fuck. I was even born in Good Hope Hospital. Was I always destined to be a Star Wars fan? Hmm. Bottled hope, liberated despair. Same old, same old. You can't teach an old Wookiee new tricks. You can gave him an old medal, though. Chewie, we're home. The prequels have been quarantined. They gots the coronavirus. Chinese flu destroyed the takings of the sequels. The great firewall of China. LOL. Where's its fatal weakness? Almost wrote "wokeness". Disney's own Great Leap Forward hasn't been so great. I felt a great disturbance in the Force as if millions of midi-chlorians suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced. Your father's lightsaber. Freudian, dirty, crude. Not elegant. But that's okay. Now it's known as Rey's saber. A reysaber. Hey, that's pretty good. Looks pretty bad. It has been remade! Wrong trilogy. They took a lot of ideas from that one, though. Cradle of filth. Dirty whoring. The First Order will not rest until Skywalker, the last Jedi, has been destroyed. That's actually a pretty cool sentence. They all are. Luke Skywalker has vanished. Luke on Crait. Premonitions. Careful you must be when sensing the future, Anakin. Where's this paragraph going? I don't know. A mysterious broadcast. Snoke as a Forcecast. Palpatine made Snoke. Good ideas, weird left-turns. Star Wars refuses to absolutely suck. But it often blows. Glass-blowing. These are some fine ornaments. Don't break them. Those urns in Revenge Of The Sith flanking Anakin. Kylo breaking his helmet and the Darth Vader plinth with Rey's help. Mask falls awkwardly to the ground. So that's where you are. Rey in the 2001 hotel, Kylo on Blade Runner planet. Kylo inside a snowglobe. I'll come tell you. Wayfinders. She's going to Exegol. She can't do that! Well, there's some pieces in there. Print that one. Anakin is a little boy who lives with his mother. These things, yeah, Jedis cut 'em down like they're butter, and they really are pretty useless. Yeah, pretty useless. Look at this ol' dangleweed here. Knights of Ren. Ghouls. Do you know why The Mandalorian sucks harder than the Sequel Trilogy? Because it's not the Sequel Trilogy. Only a Sith deals in absolutes. Thank goodness Darth Vader killed Obi-Wan before he lived to see the Sequel Trilogy. He got trapped in a box. Don't be af-rey-ed. R2-D2! It is you, it is you! George Lucas's Golden Rule of life: don't burn down the coffee shop. Steal all their beans instead? Cool beans. The villainous plot of Superman III. Rian Johnson mentioning the supercomputer from Superman III on Twitter and conflating himself with it. Rian Johnson: the ultimate trickster? Rey rising in the light. Rey's bagel rising. The Rise Of Dough-Eater. I need a weapon! You have one. Your weapons. You will not need them. I feel cold. Kylo touching the refrigerated Vader helmet. The ice theme of The Rise Of Skywalker. The Phantom Emperor. The Phantom Menace. Pulling the strings. Always, in the shadows, from the very beginning. Poe hates to be the bearer of bad news. The Force creates Anakin Skywalker to combat the sexiness of Oscar Isaac. Billy Dee Williams outcharms everyone. Yellow is the most underrated colour. Boba is the most overrated character. The Jawas have been ruined now. Stop humanising all the characters. I want to crush these idiots under JJ's mystery box. The normalisation of Star Wars is dangerous and disturbing. Entertainment losing all its leading lights. The fading grandeur of the Old Republic. There'll never be anything as beautiful as Padme's spaceships, or Padme's dresses, or Padme's handmaidens, or Padme's Padmeness ever again. This sucks. Meditation scene in Attack Of The Clones. That definitely doesn't suck. Serene beauty that you can't put your finger on is something Star Wars needs more of. Rebels vs. Empire should die. Star Wars has faulty DNA. Time for a reboot? Oh, wait. JJ already did that. Alternate timeline. Beyond the infinite. To infinity and beyond. Disney are such rip-off merchants. Disney+ sounds like a heartburn medication. Everyone is entrenching themselves into consumerist ways. Epic retreat from reality. The droid army is in full retreat. Well, if droids could think... Well, if it works... Big greasy spoon diner owner whom Obi-Wan hugs like a cephalopod. Best part of the PT? Only if all the other parts weren't best. Ahmed Best. Jar Jar should have been talking to Rey when she is about to take down the Emperor. Missed opportunities. Star Wars reached peak goodness with the prequels. Other parts are paradoxically better, but not sustained. Total vision. That's the way of King George. Everything else is kinda optional? So pick the parts you like. I like the cafeteria buffet of the ST. Especially the last film. Can't you tell? Lightspeed skipping. I'll never tire of that opening. Star Wars is like the most desirable chick you'll ever meet: sexy and annoying. It's all a machine, partner. Sex dolls are the wave of the future, but sex will be banned. D'oh! Have fun with Star Wars as an imperfect replacement for a functioning sex life. Learn to use the Force and maybe your situation will improve.
A most delectable word salad! My compliments to the chef!
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Post by Cryogenic on Dec 27, 2020 3:30:30 GMT
Paragraph breaks, Cryo, paragraph breaks! This is why lightspeed skipping is so dangerous. It's an homage to Pyro. That's part of the context. Exactly. Pyro encouraged me to do the KyloFireMoonWalk. It's fun to sometimes engage in a bout of stream-of-consciousness unspooling. Paragraph breaks (TLJ), sentence repairs (TROS)? I wrote it as one giant paragraph to reflect my little contribution's "on the fly" nature. I could have gone back and added some breaks in afterward. But it would have been an ad hoc thing and I was trying to avoid that. I think it works better as a single monolithic block. Fits the sex/use the Force motif at the end. I'm single -- geddit? But, no, really: it looks more imposing as a dense laser-beam pillar of text. It's stylistically designed to be that way. Sometimes, you have to go to an extreme to get noticed. Break some rules. Be a bit gauche. Become insane. Plus: it's fun. And it worked, didn't it? (Look, Ma! I'm doing paragraphs this time...) I've had three people quote me back in full with gobsmacked, one-line responses. Sucker-punched you all. In a loving way, of course. Technically, I'm sure you could break it into three or four segments (or paragraphs, but I'm trying to use a different term for the sake of this, er... paragraph), like this reply, and it would probably work fairly well. Or maybe it wouldn't. It's also sort of written in ironic rebellion of the superficially neat "three paragraph" (or segment, or, er... screw it) opening of all the main/major Star Wars films. I guess I failed to use enough capital letters. A capital offence! But I only shot the sheriff. Or the Sans Serif. No -- must snap out of bad puns. Oh, crap. Bad puns make the world go round. Except to Flat Earthers. Star Wars fans are a little like Flat Earthers. They deny the sphericity of Star Wars. The gravity-well, time-bending aspect of it. What a bunch of relentlessly awesome shit they're missing out on! Squeaky door handles are distracting. Momentarily obscure reference to perils of mundane domestic circumstances interfering with lofty thought processes. And since I want to spell it out for some reason: vague reference to the first "Skype" conversation between Rey and Kylo being terminated by Luke emerging from his creaky metal X-Wing door. Star Wars is real. What I delivered, or some part of me did, on a whim, is an epic sandcrawler of a paragraph: a fulsome fulmination (in the Force). Of course, it's utterly ridiculous. Who cares? Just a load of self-indulgent tripe. But that's the point. And maybe there's still some structure at work; and sub-structures I'm unaware of. I wrote it to sound goofy, mocking, yet passionate and engaged. Because that's what Star Wars does to me. It's like a silly sit-down. Cryo banging the Star Wars world to rights. Cryo simply banging his drum. Dumb preaching. Drum preaching! Maybe some underlying satirical commentary on the way people talk about Star Wars online was half-intended. I definitely think there are layers to what I wrote out. It came out fast, but I have confidence in it. If I say so myself, it's pleasing to look at. Yay! I achieved something. I made something. Tiny, insignificant, trivial. But hey: I still exist. Doing things is an affirmation of being. Aren't we all doing things and making things in our own way? Look what you have made. Man, I love that line of Palpatine's. Pure brilliance. It really resonates. Some lines and moments in Star Wars really do that, don't they? Binary sunsets. An infinitude of them. I'm babbling, but I'd just to just clarify: I don't think I'm as obscure, as flighty, or as berserk as Pyro is capable of being. It's not me. I mean: it's not within me. Or it doesn't feel as if it is. I'm still waiting for the Force to unlock those doors. I'm Pyro on ice. He's me on fire. A jinn of language. I can't hope to compare. But I do my own thing, and y'know, Pyro is sometimes envious of me. He thinks being more normal and straightforward with prose is a skill I have which he often lacks (or believes he lacks). I don't know about that, but yes: what I vomited out was written in tribute to him. I'm not trying to be him. But maybe trying to be a little more like him. Hmm. Emulation. Deep theme in the Sequel Trilogy. Very meta, very dangerous. Clones and dyads, too. Although those are more like "items" than themes. Ask Pyro about treating films as collections of items. That's his new obsession at the moment. He can explain it better than I can. That said, I just treated myself to several TROS books for Christmas, including the "Visual Dictionary", and it beautifully justifies looking at films -- or these films -- on those terms. There's a lovely resonance in AOTC, too: If an item does not appear in our records... See, what you can do, with a meaty-enough bit of writing, on basically anything, is "lightspeed skip" over the top of it -- and inside it (eww). Sort of zoom in and out of the text, causing other things to crash and explode behind you. Imagine doing it with John Williams music (and the sexiness of Oscar Isaac) and it really works. You can traverse a vast tract of spacetime, or textspace, very quickly. It's cool. But what you really should do is look for little trinkets and patterns and parse them out. Just for the joy of it. Count up how many times something happens or looks like it could have happened. I mentioned TROS a few times. I even gave it alternate titles. That sort of thing. Basic conclusion: Cryo is a bit horny for TROS right now. Basic response from Cryo: I plead innocent guilty of all charges. But there's much more going on in any piece of text than that. Fuck it. I want to say my text. False modesty. Yes, in my text, there's more going on. Has to be. I (sort of) did it on purpose. All those little quotes. Many of which were chosen to echo the next one along. A textual game of Connect 4. Or Tetris. Or something. It makes sense to me. You have to build something into your little abode. Interior decor. But it's also the scaffolding of the whole piece. |
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Post by Pyrogenic on Dec 27, 2020 18:54:29 GMT
Pyrogenic: Hello, Star Wars.
Star Wars: Hello.
Pyrogenic: Do you contain infinite hidden messages?
Star Wars: Yes.
Pyrogenic: That's great.
Star Wars: I agree.
Pyrogenic: How would I go about creating an inventory of all the things you contain?
Star Wars: This is impossible!
Pyrogenic: Because you're perpetually interpretable?
Star Wars: The weapons on your fighters may not penetrate the shields.
Pyrogenic: Are you referring to your audiovisual texture technically saying everything outside the context of your obviously quotable dialogue?
Star Wars: Possibly.
Pyrogenic: I'm confused about something.
Star Wars: What is it?
Pyrogenic: How can a normal person ever understand what you're communicating in response to any user input?
Star Wars: You can't.
Pyrogenic: Why not?
Star Wars: It's too big.
Pyrogenic: There seems to have been a catastrophic cultural misunderstanding of what any movie says on the most basic level imaginable.
Star Wars: You must contact me.
Pyrogenic: *attains enlightenment*
Star Wars: *explosion*
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Post by Cryogenic on Dec 27, 2020 23:15:02 GMT
Pyrogenic: Hello, Star Wars. Star Wars: Hello. Pyrogenic: Do you contain infinite hidden messages? Star Wars: Yes. Pyrogenic: That's great. Star Wars: I agree. Pyrogenic: How would I go about creating an inventory of all the things you contain? Star Wars: This is impossible! Pyrogenic: Because you're perpetually interpretable? Star Wars: The weapons on your fighters may not penetrate the shields. Pyrogenic: Are you referring to your audiovisual texture technically saying everything outside the context of your obviously quotable dialogue? Star Wars: Possibly. Pyrogenic: I'm confused about something. Star Wars: What is it? Pyrogenic: How can a normal person ever understand what you're communicating in response to any user input? Star Wars: You can't. Pyrogenic: Why not? Star Wars: It's too big. Pyrogenic: There seems to have been a catastrophic cultural misunderstanding of what any movie says on the most basic level imaginable. Star Wars: You must contact me. Pyrogenic: *attains enlightenment* Star Wars: *explosion* Before the bright times. Before the Pyro Wars... |
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